Things that randomly pop up in my mind while I shower — The Intellectual Olympics:
1. Flexibility Contest. Anyone who can touch their toes gets a prize.
2. Shame Shame Book Problem. Owner of largest collection of unread books wins a prize. Consolation prize for whoever has largest collection of (read) guilty pleasure books (I think it should be called the Janet Evanovich Award. Or the John Grisham Win. Or both. The John Evanovich Prize.)
3. Best Neutral Face. Everyone gets to listen to a very problematic, long speech about our nation. Winner keeps a face free of scorn, disgust, puzzlement or any expression asides from peaceful contemplation for the longest.
4. Best Radio Voice. Whoever comes up with the silliest thing to say in the soothiest radio voice.
5. Contrary Awards: Best quip of the night, Oscar Wilde style.
6. Sourpuss Contest: Who has the best grumpy dour face
7. Most enTitled Award: Whoever can name the most books by one Malaysian author, published locally. Amir Muhammad and other local book publishers not allowed to compete, but…
8. Biggest Book Contest: for book publishers — Whoever publishes the biggest volume (H x W x L) wins a block of wood carved like the book.
9. The Wizard of Oz: the video game competition.
10. The Marathink Prize: Whoever can hold the “thinking man” position the longest while balanced on one foot.
11. and the most popular event will be — Boozehound: Wine Drinking Competition.
12. The Grand Prize — whoever successfully manages to avoid all the prizes, but still got dragged to the event, gets the grand trophy.